| Finally happy w/myself |
[Mar. 5th, 2008|10:34 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | kitchen table | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  excited | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | mcr:give em hell kid | ] |
Wow, lol las night i felt weird.. well anyways for sum resun im all fckin happy an whut nott an its jus a weird feeling lol.. cus usually im ALLWAYS deprssed well i feel motivated, an happy an exited an keep it up! O. heres a Question have any of u wanted not to b jus skinny, butt underweight? an here ppl say your TOO skinny? well yah thats how i am.. I dont want to look discusting skinny you know jus underweight does tht even make sense? hmm... yah anyways i had a grape this morning =( which for sum resun im ok with that -weird rite-? well im gunna work extra hard an im nott startingg over today is my 4th day fasting an i made myself sick after i ate soo i feel better i know im nott gunna eat tomarow an fck im happy haha welll yeh xXx.~think thinN~.xXx |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 4th, 2008|09:18 pm] |
Ugh... i feel so discusting but i didnt eat, i dnt kno i jus feel weak, tirred, an depressed. Tomarow will b day 4 of water fasting... i feel like giving up nuthing makes sense any more.. I'm jus killing myself slowly, im not sure whut i shud do i feel relli bad my heart is beating like it did this b4 on my othr fasts,.... but not as bad i jus have a weird feeling like im gunna diee if i dnt get help........... I kno othrr ppl r struggling w/tha same issues am me but.... I stil feel so alone like no1 can understand i cant take this shet anymore i jus wanna diee. This is jus suicide anyone who wud wanna b this way pshh ill fckin pray for them... THIS IS NOT GLAMOROUS. I hate my fckin self im soo gross an dum ughh. Will we EVER relli & truely b THIN ENOUGH ? .. we're killing ourselfs well sumtimes i thnk tht this is jus my fate i deserve all of it, i remember all the times i made fun of ppl who i thot wer ugli or fatt, HA! An who tha fck am i to judge anyone? im on a pro ana site rooting ppl on mostly leading them to there death, wtf is wrong with me ? I dnt kno butt all i can say is wen u admit u have a problem, its usualli "TOO LATE". Why cant we jus b happy with what we gott? An luv ourselfs for bein us? this is a never ending game we will nvr b thin enough keep saying one more day butt b4 u know it it'll b too late for any more "one more days" an u wont wake up........ Why cant i jus b normal? an not even worry about cals an weight i mean who r we to cal pl fatt? ughhhhhh wtf is hapening to me |
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| fasting |
[Feb. 24th, 2008|11:42 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  gloomy | ] |
Eyallo well like u may of heard i need a fasting buddie soo if u need one too write me <3 |
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unperfect9732's journal
nauseated